Traditional step 2 language: We came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

The EDA steps are adapted from Alcoholics Anonymous steps which were written in the 1950s. That language uses terms like “sanity” and “insanity” in a way that can feel stigmatizing and dated in terms of how we think about mental health, eating disorders and addictions today. 

The EDA workbook tells us that in this context, we can think about “insanity” meaning acting “irrationally” or in ways that aren’t aligned with our values or priorities: spending hours weighing ourselves or trying on clothes to monitor our size; compulsively comparing bodies; exercising so much that it prevents injuries from healing or takes time away from our family, friends, hobbies or job; feeling terror about body changes th8at prevents us from doing things we want to do. One of the hard things about eating disorders is that… these behaviors and their outcomes may feel “rational” or “sane” – at least for a while – because many people DO get positive reinforcement for being a smaller size, controlling what they eat, excessive exercise, meeting traditional ideas of femininity, etc. But after taking step 1, we know the high of these pay-offs can’t last forever. We can’t pick and choose which eating disorder symptoms and behaviors we experience. We can’t have “manageable” eating disorders. 

The EDA workbook then reminds us that just because we have used eating disorder behaviors  doesn’t mean we are broken and we don’t need someone or something to save us. What we need is a hopeful vision for what a better life could look like and hope that we can get our needs met without an eating disorder. We need to trust that we can learn to live in a way that feels better if we keep moving forward, step by step towards more balance. Built into all 12 step programs is the concept that recovery comes from replacing behaviors and ways of thinking that don’t work with something stronger and more meaningful. 

This is where the idea of a Higher Power comes in. Many 12 step programs and fellowships default to talking about “God” or “God as we understand him.” For many of us though, religion and traditional ideas of God have been sources of pain in our lives. The core component of step 2 doesn’t need any direct reference to God or even a higher power. What is important is that we learn to lean on and prioritize SOMETHING higher than our eating disorder – especially when we feel scared, stuck or uncomfortable. The EDA workbook says: “Our concepts of Higher Power change and grow with us. It is okay not to have it all figured out…. Some consider the support of their group their Higher Power. Some people consider their own inner wisdom and their deep desire to get better their Higher Power. Some people consider the love they feel for friends and family their Higher Power. A Higher Power can be a set of habits and attitudes which gives your life direction. The concept leaves room for all different belief and value systems. It encompasses any spirituality and religion. When we are active in our eating disorder we are using it as our higher power. These behaviors offer little true peace or comfort. Many of us were at war with food and our bodies. [Recovery] means developing a different relationship with ourselves.”

Many Roads is a peer support group for people who want to recover from their eating disorders. We have free, virtual online meetings. We take an expansive, feminist, lgbtqia+ affirming, trauma informed approach to the 12 steps. For more information, www.manyroadsedrecovery.com.